“Other people make more for the same job…my coworkers are favored…etc.” If you find yourself tangled in this unfair web, it’s worth assessing the longer-term consequences of favoritism!
It’s So Unfair!
When others have an “in,’ or when coworkers are favored, it is probably a fact they receive preferential treatment. That could mean more money, less discipline, a window seat at the office, etc.
If the favored are clearly receiving special treatment, you naturally get furious, irate, or worse! What your brain does is offer all kinds of thoughts around this scenario:
- What about my contributions, they don’t care!
- I’m not a brown-noser and I’m getting punished for it!
And the list goes on. Your brain is trying to justify your anger and resentment, which seems quite logical. But what your brain probably doesn’t do is try to envision the longer-term consequences. This exercise requires more effort and thought work, and it doesn’t seem so logical on the surface.
Therefore, let us compare the potential long-term consequences of the favored vs. unfavored.
Bucket 1: The Favored
These people have it easier in their day-to-day. Mistakes might be brushed off or ignored. They have the support of influential people at work who are willing to back them up. The favored may make more money. Their performance evaluations may contain nothing but fluffy words that speak highly.
For people in bucket 1: they are being protected, carried and supported by the movers and shakers. Guess what happens when the movers and shakers move on, leave the company or get walked out the door (which a frequent occurrence)!
The favored are left to fend for themselves with nobody to back them up anymore. They have no friends. They have no identity. The favored linger in a very vulnerable position of having to gain trust and claw their way back to a position of respect. They most likely will start from scratch … if they’re lucky enough to make it that far.
Why in the world would you want this for yourself?
Bucket 2: The Unfavored
The unfavored have it harder their day-today. They must account for mistakes. They may not have the support of influencers, which leaves them to defend their work all by themselves. The unfavored may not make as much money.
For people in bucket 2: they are being protected, carried and supported by themselves. When movers and shakers move on or leave the company, people in Bucket 2 are protected. They know what it means to carry their own weight and back themselves up because they’ve learned how to do it all along.
Therefore, people in bucket 2 are more sturdy, grounded, resilient, adaptable, and emotionally stable. Not only do these critical skills help in the short-term but they are transferable forever!
In conclusion, when you see that coworkers are favored, remember that
- There could exist a justification in the employer’s eyes
- Preferential treatment hurts people and sets them up to fail
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